Be warned, this is a major whiney rant. You might want to just stop reading now.

I’m Webelos leader. I don’t really like it. At all. Thankfully I’m working with 10 year olds and they are almost normal. I just don’t handle children really well. I’m not a children person. In ten years this is the first time someone at church has asked me to do something with someone under the age of 12. And this is including several years of being callingless when the primary of course needed teachers and kept begging for me since I was callingless. What’s that about? I tried numerous times to sub because I really wanted to help out and it seemed like what I should do. You know, young new Sisters are thrown in the primary. But every experience was massively horrible. But I kept going back and volunteering to sub. I finally figured out by prayer that I just don’t belong there. Did the Lord change his mind? What’s the deal. I can barely handle my kids. Only reason I cope is because I love them and I escape the house every chance I get. THey are good kids but they are so trying.

So anyway, since September (Our anniversary to be specific) my husband and I have had three massive fights that led me to tears. It happened again tonight. He was on me about how we need a leader meting and I told him to tell me when it was and I’d be there and so he’s all like blah blah blah and stuff. All I know is he’s the committee chair and he’s the leader. So he should call us to order and if he has any ideas he should bring them up and he should help guide us to ideas and help us plan the year and stuff. Well he went off about how he wasn’t going to tell us exactly what to do. I never freaking told him he was like the dictator god of scouting or anything. Just that as chair he should lead us and guide us. He’s like ‘No you guys come up with all your activities.” I’m like ‘Hey you can come up with ideas or help us with ideas if we need help.” He’s like “No I’m not there to tell you exactly what you have to do each month.” OMG… I’m not saying that. LISTEN TO ME. “I’m listening to you.” So finally I go off on him and tell him I’m not saying he’s the dictator and we’re going to be going HEIL HITLER and bowing down to him so he stormed off.

This is after some woman at church with a new webelo went a little nutso about the upcoming pinewood derby thingy and then she was all appologetic. I guess her husband makes life miserable around their house so she dreads it. So she complained and then appologized for complaining like a million times. Hey I don’t care. He doesn’t have to do it. I’m not gonna be offended. I really could care less… So I probably offended her but I didn’t know what else to say so I just kept saying “I don’t care, it doesn’t bother me. Really don’t worry about.” But she wouldn’t stop. I just felt it so important to let her know I really didn’t mind that it didn’t bother me and so I just kept saying “I don’t care, it’s OK… really”

Well to make it worse I get home and Sir Megabyte and I get into a big fight over what is going to happen at some parents meeting he was saying he needed to figure out when to have and so on and so forth. I mean come on. Well he got mad because I told him he’s supposed to lead us so if he has something he wants to do he should tell us. But he starts freaking out telling me it isn’t his job as committee chair to come in and dictate to us what we did every week. I never said it was. Just that he’s basically our leader so he should guide us and help us plan events. UGH.

Anyway… blah.

I don’t feel like complaining anymore. I’d like to just ignore the world and pretend scouts doesn’t exist.