**LJ Idol Season 4 Week 10 Entry: Whose Blog is it anyway? Balancing personal expression and friends-list sensibilities in determining content.**

Moderator: Welcome, everyone, to our panel discussion entitled “The Blogo-what? Sounds like Something Dirty!”  I’m your host, CrzyBo.  I’d like the panelists to first introduce themselves and say something about their blog.

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: Like, hi!  I’m xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx.  I got kicke off all the public blog sites so you can like, totally find me at my personal blog.  That’s xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx.com  I mostly post pictures of me and my h0t friends, but also I blog about our latest drinks we’ve tried.  365 different drinks this year!

Moderator: Yes, I visited your blog before coming to the convention.  Uh, I’d like to warn you guests, it is not work or family safe.  It is good to see you came clothed to the panel… sort of.

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: Like, you totally like my new bikini?  I am gonna totally hit the pool after this panel.  Figured why bother like, having to climb eight flights of stairs to change, you know?

Moderator: (clears throat) Good point. Omni is greek for “take the stairs” isn’t it? (crowd chuckles) Next?

tHesPorkKing: Yo, everyone! I’m The Spork King.  I blog on livejournal, have for the last 5 years.  I blog whatever happens that seems interesting and have 427 peeps on my friends list.  Hey, shout out to all of you!  I’ve having a party in my room for my blog readers.  Tonight.  3007 – Or maybe I should say that’s Dirty-07!  The bar is already stocked!

Moderator: Excellent. I’ll be sure to come.  Next?

myspaceh0ttie07: Hey everyone, I’m a myspace addict.  Could you tell by my shirt.  (Points to a shirt stretched two sizes two small over size DD cups stating “You looked hotter on myspace”) I love myspace, and spend about every waking minute on it.  Thank God for browser access on cell phones!  (waves cell phone in the air) As for my blog, I dunno. I just post stuff.

Moderator: You are very prolific.  Especially with the memes.  I’m sure we’ll come to that.  Next?

h0t@$$gnome: Hey hey hey everyone!  It’s the Hot @$$ gnome here!!!  (crowd cheers wildly) First off, I’d just like to say “Sporks Unite!”

tHesPorkKing: Hell, yeah!  Sporks Unite!!!  (various matching calls from the crowd)

h0t@$$gnome: You are the King, baby!  As for me? I also LJ.  What do I blog? Mostly me in my gnome-glory. Me and the hot babes that want me.  You’d be surprised what being a gnome and wearing a kilt can do for you with the ladies.  All I have to say is, hot damn I thought us men were dirty?  Geeze. We have nothing on you ladies!

Moderator: I have never seen so many hot babes outside a playboy magazine as on your blog, h0t@$$gnome!  You are prime to be the next Heff.

h0t@$$gnome: A gnome can only hope.  You ladies want to see some gnome action in the playboy mansion? (at cheers from some women in the front row, h0t@$$gnome stood and shook his kilt clad rump at the audience)

Moderator: Ok, OK, there’ll be time for that at Spork’s party.  Girls, get your gnome on later tonight.

tHesPorkKing: Hell, yeah!  Just remember, Dirty-oh-seven!

Moderator: And for our last panelist?

LadyOzma: Hey, everyone.  I’m LadyOzma.  Yeah, I mirror my blog… um, everywhere just about.  Just google me, it’ll be easier.

Moderator: Is it true that in the dark you…

LadyOzma: Google myself?  That’s what I say.

Moderator: I’m a little disappointed.  I know what you wear to blog and why aren’t you wearing it now?

LadyOzma: Hey, my readers can only take so much of the Oz glory.  Besides, some things are better left to the imagination.  What am I supposed to do? I can’t have the convention guests dropping like flies at the sight of me in my sexy negligee and bunny slippers.

Moderator: This is true.  But, a guy can hope.

LadyOzma: It’s OK. This way you can keep questioning.  Just how low cut is that sexy negligee?  How much lace is on it?

Moderator: What you wear under it?

LadyOzma: You get the idea! I must admit though, I’m unsure why I’m even on this panel.  I mean, I blogged long before blogging became hot, like me. But my readership sure isn’t what my fellow panelists have.  Can I say, I checked you all out… wow.  How do you keep up?

tHesPorkKing: Well, when you’re the King, Lady…  Speaking of which, as a Lady you beter come to court tonight…

Moderator: (chuckles) You are the king!  Lady Ozma, you are here because of your participation in LJ-Idol of course!

LadyOzma: Hmmm. I suppose.  Idol has been awesome so far!  I am really happy that some pretty powerful people backed me early on.  I’d never have made it this far without the support of my fellow Idolers.  They all rock.

Moderator: Ok, intros are out the way.  Let’s really get down to the discussion topics.  But, you know, I’m not going to start out with the easy stuff.  Let’s go for the meat!  I want everything!  So, panelists, the first question is, “Who’s blog is this? How do you decide what to post and not to post on your blog?”

LadyOzma: Geeze, you really cut to the chase don’t ya?

Moderator: Well we want it to be interesting for the guests, don’t we?

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: Of course. Which is why I say post what you want as long as there’s plenty of skin showing.

tHesPorkKing: You sure do show a lot of it, too.  Are you pissed they kicked you off livejournal and myspace?  You know, I didn’t even know they did that before you!

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: The way I see it is, their loss.  I was bringing mega people to their site.  Hello, isn’t that like, free advertising for them or something?  Whatever. They are a like, a bunch of old dudes anyway. Probably just jealous cause I’m h0t and they’re like… not.  Or pissed cause they see my h0tness and can’t get it up.

LadyOzma: You are braver than me.  The thought that there’s a bunch of barely pubescent teens out there doing goodness knows what to my picture kinda creeps me out.  I think I’d have to use a filter or something if I wanted to post a photograph.

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: Filters are like, lame. I mean seriously. What are you afraid of? Like you are going to see 98% of these people in real life?  Whatever.  Filters, they are for the like, fat and ugly.  Just go for it, Lady O!

tHesPorkKing: Now, I don’t know about that.  I do use filters. I have an image to protect you know.  I don’t want peeps to know EVERYTHING about me.

h0t@$$gnome: Hell, yeah. I mean, I may be a gnome, but maybe I’ve got my softer side. Not many people know this, but I totally dig Russian poetry. I have a filter where I talk about the latest Russian poem I’ve read.  I only have about four people that are privvy to that.

LadyOzma: Russian Poetry?  That’s cool!  How do I get added to that filter?

h0t@$$gnome: How about I get a looksee at your workspace.  maybe get a photo with ya working? (winks at LadyOzma) You game, Lady O?

LadyOzma: (blushes) Um, uh, um…

h0t@$$gnome: That’s OK.  People often get flustered when they see The Gnome turning his attention on them.  We can hash it out later.   What about you though?  Do you use filters?  I’d love to be in one of your filters? (winks again)

LadyOzma:  You know, actually I have filters.  But, I never use them.

tHesPorkKing: What did you set them up for if you don’t use them?

LadyOzma: Good question.  I guess I thought there were some things I wanted to write about maybe I didn’t want to share with people.

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: Like, those naughty picturs of yourself?

LadyOzma: (laughs) No.  I just thought that while it’s MY blog, and thus a place for me to post, I probably didn’t need to share everything with the public.  I mean, it’s like when you are 12 and you have that diary between your mattress and your boxsprings.  You have a fight with your best friend and you write in there, “Gosh, I hate my bff because she’s such a brat and I never want to see her again.”  Then of course you feel better and you forgive her and you never want her to see that.

tHesPorkKing: You fight with your friends often that this would be an issue?

h0t@$$gnome: Yeah? And if so, can I come and watch?  (holds up camera) I’m totally ready any time!

LadyOzma: Not really, but that’s just the kind of thing.  I mean sometimes you just need a place to rant and get your feelings out.  Because they are feelings for right now, but they aren’t really a true indication of how you feel the majority of the time.  We all hate our cars at the gas pump or when they need to be serviced, but we’ll never REALLY give them up. You know?

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: Like, I see that.  I mean one time I was like posting something and my boyfriend’s sister saw it and oh my god it was like such a nightmare.  She called her mom.  She called her dad.  She called everyone.  I wouldn’t doubt it if she like called her second grade teacher.  Like, she thought I was totally some kind of like tramp. I say, if I got it, why not flaunt it, you know?  Besides, just who did she think was like taking all the pictures of me anyway?  Duh?  But yeah it turned into so much like… drama.

h0t@$$gnome: Dang, I remember that.  You were on LJ back then.  It made that LJ Drama blog.  Holy crap.  That was a nightmare.  I remember, you didn’t post for like a week!

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: Yeah I was like, all thinking I didn’t need that.  You know?  But then I remembered I learned something back in school.  Like some kind of a right or some such that says I can say and write any old thing I want and no one can stop me.  So I figured, I’ll just post what I want, and ain’t no one able to say a thing abou tit.

LadyOzma: You mean the First Ammendment?

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: Yeah, maybe that’s like it.

LadyOzma: No, that’s it.  I was a journalist in a former life.  I know the First Ammendment backwards and forwards.

Moderator: Is that why your blog is the way it is?

LadyOzma: Like essays or whatever?  I guess.  It used to be more like a diary, and a place to post my memes, but somewhere along the way I stopped doing that.  I don’t know what really happened.  Sometimes I miss it, but sometimes I don’t.

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: So you like, put effort in your entries?

LadyOzma: Yeah, I guess.  Though I have to admit, sometimes not as much as you might think.  I hate editing so often what I send out is what most people would call a rough draft.  But, I decided I didn’t want to deal with any possible drama.  Not that anyone reads my blog, but you know… I saw way too many people getting into trouble.  Plus, I really wanted to excercise my writing while playing stay at home mommy.  Besides, my mother reads this thing.  You know, the last thing I REALLY want is her to get a peek at the diary between the mattress, you know?

tHesPorkKing: But that’s like censorship.  That’s bad.  Isn’t that what they do in like evil dictator countries and stuff?

LadyOzma: Well, yes and no.  I think people censor themselves more than they like to admit.  Like I said, I checked you guys all out.  We already had Gnome here tell us he hides his posts on russian poetry.  That’s a censorship.  I checked out xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx and she posts plenty of pictures north of the equator but none really below… It’s kind of like when we’re having a total crap day.  When people say “Hey, how are ya?” we just smile and say OK, even though it’s a crap day.

xxx-h0tgurrl-xxx: That’s like a totally good point.  And you are right.  I don’t mind showing off the girls, but the rest?  That’s nunya.  You know what I mean?  But you said you set up filters but don’t use them.  Did you ever?  I never even set up a filter.  I’m curious.

LadyOzma: Actually I did for a while.  But that was due to this one person… I just felt she didn’t need to know everything going on.  Sweetest gal on the planet but sometimes… a little much to deal with. Mostly if I did anything though it was just to make a completely private post.  Mostly when I was in one of those funks where I was like “Oh man my life sucks today”.  You know, where i just needed a place to vent out my frustrations.

Moderator: All very good points.  But, we haven’t heard from one of you.  myspaceh0ttie07?

myspaceh0ttie07: (looks up from phone)  What?  Oh.  I’m sorry.  I never really thought much about it.  Hello?  It’s called “myspace” for a reason.  It’s mine.  I do what I want.  In fact, I was bored with it so I just faked my death.

Moderator: What?  You did what?

myspaceh0ttie07: Well you know, things have been slow so I thought this would be fantastic fun.  Anyone here on myspace?  Spread it!!!  I logged in under a second account and left a comment saying that I never showed up for this panel and I was found dead in my hotel room.  I’ve had 8 comments left on my main myspace page already of people freaking out.

Moderator: What about the backlash when they find out you are alive?

myspaceh0ttie07: Um, didn’t think about it.  But who cares?  People don’t like it they can defriend me.  Which I guess is my thought on the whole big question you asked anyway.  If you don’t like what I put up.  Defriend me.  I answer to no one but me.  But really, it’s just a blog.  Do people really get THAT upset over this stuff?  LadyOzma is right, it’s like that diary.  You gotta take everything with a grain of salt.

LadyOzma: Absolutely.  I say take your blog and make it what you want.

h0t@$$gnome: Exactly my view on blogs.  And gnomes.  Anyone want to take this gnome?  (cheers from crowd)

Moderator: Ok, thank you everyone.  I guess what you are saying is that this is your blog and you make of it what you want.  Readership, filters, and content are completely up to each individual.  (panelists nod)  Let’s move to the next hot topic.  With so many blogging services out there, which one do I choose?  What do you guys think is the best and why?

-Lady O

*Yet another entry in the wild world of LJ-Idol.  Hope you enjoyed this!*

Originally posted on ladyozma.vox.com