It began at the start of the year. In the women’s class at Church, the Bishop came in. (Non-LDS folks, he’s like the pastor/preacher.) Now it is a pretty brave man to take on the women of any church, but we are a nice group of ladies and we waited patiently to hear what he desired to impart to all of us. I do not know what others thought, but I totally wanted to jump out of my seat, shout “Amen!”, and do a little dance my agreement was that strong.
Never fear, I restrained myself. His idea was simple enough. In our church and temples, we strive for reverence. Ok, we are just as social as the rest of humanity and sometimes on Sunday get a bit boisterous before and after meetings as we greet one another. That’s OK. Overall, though, we try to foster a spirit of reverence while we worship.
Many of different faiths say, “home can be a heaven on earth.” I do believe this. Our homes should become our respite from the world. A place where we can relax after a long day at work or driving the kids to various activities. You get the idea, right?
I don’t know about YOUR home, but I have two boys. One is a teenager and one is almost a teenager. At the time the Bishop came in, I also had my lovely Thai “daughter” living with us as well. Two teens, a tween, a chihuahua, my husband, and myself all in a small home. It could get… noisy. Yeah, we’ll say “noisy”.
The Bishop’s idea centered around trying to help things be a little calmer at home. Let’s face it, no one is going to have a perfectly quiet home where harp music plays in the background. It just won’t happen no matter how heavenly it sounds! However, we can find ways to properly interface with our family members. With proper interactions, maybe the peace in our homes can at least stand a “fighting” chance.
Perfect example: Do I really need to holler at the top of my lungs, “DINNER!!!!!” leading to the inevitable thundering heard of elephants… uh I mean kids… racing for the dinner table? Absolutely not. I can go seek out my various family members and invite them kindly to dinner. We all have mobile phones, so I could send out a blanket text which would not only stay quiet, but also reach those outside the home.
It’s all about options and what we choose to do with them. Changing the actions in our lives to try to create a more peaceful environment. Is my family successful at having a quieter home, as my Bishop requested? Not always. I can say that, after nine and a half months of attempting to find ways other than yelling for one another, I am happier. I enjoy the greater sense of peace.
I think my Bishop was brilliant in coming up with this idea. Truly inspired. I think it’s crazy I didn’t think about doing something like this before because I’ve ALWAYS hated the yelling. It just hurts my ears and as someone that suffers from migraines, it’s just hard on me.
I found this idea for taking the month of October to “Making Your Home a Haven”. I read through the ideas, and thought it would go hand in hand with the several efforts going on with my family for 2010. I came late, but I plan to do it anyway. I want to give it the full time allotted for the experience so I plan to just lag behind. Since I’m altering it already, I’m also changing the day of the week to post on from Sunday to Monday. Feel free to join in with me if you like!
Week 1: October 18 – Go buy an extra large candle and light a candle everyday in your home. Each time the candle catches your eye, say a prayer for peace in your home.
I have my large candle ready to go. I’ll report back on Monday of next week with how this affected me throughout the week and to give the challenge for week 2 so you can know what I’m working towards!
–Lady O
I will plug in my sentsy instead of lighting a candle (because I would seriously burn the house down if allowed to have open flames!)
That is a really good idea your bishop had. I think we’re relativly quiet right now, as we are still a small and young family, but I know that will change as DS gets older and if we have more children. One thing that I like to do is listen to sacred Christmas music — specifically John Rutter. That always seems to do us good.
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LOL, well we don’t want you to burn down your house. In my experience with fireman in-laws, this seems a rather bad thing. Go with the sentsy. Just make sure it’s somewhere relatively noticeable so you can remember to pray for peace!
I’ve got a little block candle from a housewarming gift. It was so pretty that I haven’t wanted to burn it. Saving it for a special occasion and all that. Which is silly. I’ve set it all up on my dining room table. I’m excited to do this. I’m heading out for a lunch appointment, so I haven’t lit it yet.
My Bishop is brilliant. I love him very much. I know he’s exceedingly inspired and I’m grateful to him. I liked the challenge to cut the yelling in our homes and to find a way to invite the Spirit and peace in little ways. It has made a profound impact on me. He’s also asked for us to pray three times a day. I’m so-so on follow through on this one. I try, but I get busy. It has definitely impacted me for the positive.
There’s a music week coming up. I’m looking forward to that one. It’s all I can do to not jump ahead! LOL
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Atomic Mom is everywhere today! I’m impressed.
I love the idea of not yelling for nonessential things (like, you know, toilet paper). I think I will try this. I need a little more of haven in my house.
I would do the whole candle thing, too, expect I am putting all decorating buying on hold until I move. I’ll have to have something else to look at as a reminder. Hmm, better get thinking.
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Charlotte, it’s because I’m trying to become the most popular girl on the internet. 🙂
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You aren’t the most popular girl on the internet yet? Hey, does that mean I can somehow beat you as most popular girl? I’m so gonna try!
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Atomic Mom has her surfboard out and is showing off her mad net skillz! 🙂
I really liked the idea of not yelling. I’ve never been a fan. I have been known to IM people on the other end of the house long before my Bishop came rolling into RS. But seriously, I think he’s brilliant. I will love him forever for giving me the ability to say: But the Bishop said!
Good luck. I hope you can try it and succeed. It’s not so easy to get everyone on board. I will say that we have come up with all sorts of things. We have a split foyer so sometimes we’ll stomp a pattern if we are upstairs and want the boys and have our hands full. Things like that. HEHE
I can understand about the candle thing. Having moved 12 times in 16 years, trust me. I get it. I have no real ideas for you since you are probably packing things up. Maybe a picture of Christ in the middle of the table? Or set it in a chair? It’s an idea from our Bishop’s counselor. He apparently had an unruly class of boys once so he did this to try to bring reverence into the classroom. Our Primary has adopted it.
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Love your posts. The part about not hollering to announce dinner, but quietly inviting each member was such an “Aha” Moment! Very true. The energy you put out into the world very much determines the energy around you. 🙂
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Thank you!!!
I’ve hated the hollering for years. When my Bishop came into the women’s meeting to talk to us about this very thing I wanted to get up and weep at his feet. I then wanted to go find his wife and tell her to bake him whatever his fave treat was because I was ever so thankful. 🙂 I must say I’ve felt far more peaceful this year as we’ve taken the yelling down… besides it definitely helps with the interpersonal connections of your family to go to them instead of talking to faceless people that may or may not be listening.
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