I signed on to the LJ Idol contest on a whim. My good friend, sircaliban, told me about it and we decided to buddy support one another.
It started in November with 154 of us trapped in the LJ-Idol House. Who would remain and who would leave? Each week the topics brought more challenges and the votes became more anxious.
It is now mid-March and there are only 40 of us left.
We’ve written about love, about politics, about scars, about ourselves, about a great many things. Some have grown strong in their writing. Some blossomed before our eyes.
As for me? The friendships formed are like non other. I regret nothing about Idol. I hope that I can remain for more weeks, though each week it is harder and harder. There were weeks I thought for sure the vote would reveal my departure. I know it is the effort of my fellow Idol friends pulling for me, as well as people like my mother and local friends. No one else to thank, but them.
So thank you all.
This week I struggled. Partly because my husband worked a heinous shift this week and last and you combine that with the Congressionally Instituted Time Change, exhaustion became my closest friend. The other reason was my partner.
minikin and I teamed up for this week. Our votes get tallied together to determine a winner. She emailed me her idea for the topic of “Unsatisfied” and I loved it. After she emailed me the rough draft, I was floored. Everything and more. That’s the only way to describe it.
And I longed to write the companion piece to hers, but could not. My husband and I formed rules for my blog, and the companion piece could easily bend or break those rules.
Yet, I still wanted to do it. Oh, how I wanted to do it.
Given my interests and talents, I am called on far too often to lend aid and come across people dealing with this very thing. I understand so well the shock, the hurt, the shame. You do not want to know how often I see a face of someone dealing with this struggle.
I wanted to post a companion piece to compliment hers and to help people know they are not alone. And that there is love and hope out there.
Minikin lay herself open for all to see. She revealed things about herself that I know did not come easy. She stated things that many in this world would say “are no big deal”.
Minikin, you are my hero for this week. I love you so much for having the bravery to write your entry and post it on your blog for the whole world to see. I love for you for finding a way to write it so everyone can understand you. I love you for the changes you have made and are making in your life.
Read Minikin’s entry about dealing with her sexual addiction and coming back to Christ. She wanted to change herself, but needed to find a way to fill the hole that her addiction did not truly fill. She bravely speaks about this, and about coming to realize the redeeming power of Christ’s love.
You go, girl.
Sexual addiction is a real problem, though the world would tell you that all the free love is fine and dandy. That things are OK, no matter how much your heart says they aren’t. Pornography and the sex industry ensnare far too many people and their loved ones pay a serious price.
Loving someone with an addiction is hard. It takes all you have from you. It makes you feel as though in some way you are the cause of the addiction. If not or your failure, this person would have no need of looking elsewhere for happiness. In the case of sexual addictions/pornography addictions it is so much worse.
There is no way that we normal people can ever hope to compare with the things out there. No amount o plastic surgery is going to give me size 2 pants that fit, DDD cups, and a leggy height of five foot nine. I dare say more woman fall into my spectrum on this than this so-called ideal.
The things I hear, the things I see from my fellow sisters when they learn of their husband’s indiscretions. The way their heart breaks and they struggle to every feel worthy of another’s love.
Minikin let’s us see what the world is like for the addicted person. She embodies a hope that maybe addictions can end. That we can all fight our baser needs and return from the slippery slope. For those dealing with a loved one suffering from such an addiction, I think Minikin offers hope of change.
I believe Minikin deserves votes because her entry is so moving and touches on something very prevalent in our society. Something that victims are far too ashamed to admit. She showed tremendous strength, courage, and humility in posting her entry.
Thank you, Mini. Thank you. I wish so much we were partners next week, too. Alas, the partnerships end after this round.
If you would like to vote for me, I appreciate it. My entry is about homeschool and something funny my kids said during one of our lessons on the Declaration of Independence.
I have not read any other entries at this time. So, I have no other recommendations to make. I hope you understand why I posted this even though I don’t normally. Yes, Minikin’s entry moved me that much.
The Voting Booth only asks that you have an ID for LJ. You can vote for as many people as you like.
Take care. For anyone following Juan of the Dead… I have Chapter 4 partially written. It’s just been a really bad week. It is coming, it will just be late. As for Walking With Women, it’ll come, but probably late on Sunday. I’m about 3/4ths of the way through preparing for it, but our Sunday is a very busy one.